from my ARCHIVE

Once I had a “small” yet, happy family.

Actually, I don”t really know where am I going to start. Am I going to introduce first my family? Or start from the day that I've found out that I have my family?

at the back of our church

Almost all of friends described me as witty, jolly, assertive, ambitious and etc., at first I just ignore those compliments because, I don't want to describe as being vainglorious in front of them. And when regards to my personality, as being a gay was a big issue. There were lots of circumstances happened that I always ask myself, Why am I like this? Why are this happening to me? Who am I supposed to be? Even though these questions don't have answers at all, I'm still striving myself to find those answers, and living my life to the fullest.

As all were expecting I had a happy family, but there were still times that minor and major conflicts arisen.

Like my father, he was an alcoholic before and I always got frightened on him to that cause in no time he'll just hit me, with or without any valid reason. There were times that I was playing outside with my friends and he just hit me and that was embarrassing on my concern to the point that all of my neighbors saw what was happened. Actually at that time I officially admit to myself that I'm not pleasant for my father's sight.

Another one was when my mother had a serious disease, it has been a month before she recovered from it. I though it was her end, and thank God I was wrong.

And when I was in high school, my father was caught in an serious accident while he was riding on his motorcycle along his way home from work, and because of that he had a major complication in his Urinary System. And he got major operations and he took him a year to recovered from that tragedy. That was the turning point of my life that I realized that I do really love my father, even though he was always drunk and always have that FALSE BELIEF about myself as being a gay, that I have no good things done in my life. That was the moment that God did something good change in my life. I got involved in Sunday school and realized that I have s Savior an Friend. That from the very start I was walking along my path, He was together with me, from the time of despair He was with me. Then I brought my siblings together with me in church every Sunday, then next my mother and lastly my father.

Now, I'm one of the blessed scholar of our church, currently a Sunday school teacher of our Sunday school ministry, and a proud! Worship Leader of our music ministry. It was a total change in my family. My family are now always in church every Sunday, and it was the most precious gift from God, in spite of trials and conflicts within my family, were blessed that were still standing by Faith, Hope and LOVE. ^^